Dear fellow theatergoers at WONDERLAND last night: Three things to think about before your next excursion to the theater:
1) bringing an infant to a Broadway show is not a good idea, particularly one with a bad cough who cries through the first act.
2) if you feel the need to rummage loudly through your crinkly plastic bags, try to do it before the show or wait FIVE MINUTES until after the closing number of Act 1. choosing to do it while that number is being performed — or any number, for that matter — is completely disrespectful to the artists and those around you.
3) if you are a complete blowhard trying to impress your friends, kindly refrain from offering your review of act one at a decibel level found at the end of a LaGuardia runway. Don’t care what you think. Don’t want to hear what you think. Keep it to yourself.